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The Bard's Tale





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The Bard's Tale





You are the Bard, a selfish rogue weary of pointless sub-quests and rat-infested cellars. Through magical song you summon characters to join your quest for coin and cleavage!

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Game description

“The Bard’s Tale is easily the funniest game I’ve ever played, and I’ve played all the funny games out there.” – IGN

“Ready your weapon and bladder as you embark on this ridiculously addicting quest and the funniest adventure of the year, The Bard’s Tale” – Game Chronicles

“This game is satire in its sharpest form” – Cheat Code Central

Just Updated:

  • Includes Original Classic Trilogy

  • WASD controls for movement

  • Added French, German and Spanish Localizations for text/subtitles

  • German Dialog (accessible under Sound Options when game language is set to German)

  • Full Wide Screen support + supports resolutions higher than 1600 wide.

  • Performance enhancements.

  • External URLs links on main menu for support pages and related media.

  • Bug Fixes to original release

Now includes original classic games The Bard’s Tale 1, 2 & 3!

You are the Bard, a selfish rogue weary of pointless sub-quests and rat-infested cellars. Through magical song you summon characters to join your quest for coin and cleavage!

Prepare to immerse yourself in over 20-30 hours of adventure, featuring:

  • 50 enemy types (not counting bosses!)

  • A vast world to explore with towns, wild forests, rivers, castles, towers, secret dungeons, snowy mountains, caverns, haunted tombs and more

  • A full cast of bizarre NPC’s

  • Over a dozen special boss enemies to defeat

  • 16 magical characters to discover and then summon at will to aid you

  • Over 150 unique items of weaponry, armor, instruments, tokens, artifacts and loot!

  • More Song & Dance numbers than any other game, including a zombie dance-off!

  • Over 14 hours of outstanding voice-acting from top Hollywood talent, including Cary Elwes (The Princess Bride) as the Bard, and the inimitable Tony Jay as the Narrator

  • Classics Games—includes original classic games The Bard’s Tale 1, 2 & 3.

Game info

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InXile Entertainment
InXile Entertainment
Action, Adventure, Mac, Linux
Friday, June 17, 2005
Digital PC Download
Customer notes
Minimum Requirements


  • OS: Windows 2000/XP/Vista
  • Processor: Pentium 4 2Ghz / AMD AthlonXP 2400
  • Memory: 512Mb
  • Graphics: GeForce FX5700 or better / ATI Radeon 9600 or better
  • DirectX®: 9.0c
  • Hard Drive: 6GB of free space
  • Sound: DirectX 9 Compatible Sound Card


  • OS: OS X 10.6.0 or higher
  • Hard Drive: 3.6GB Hard disk space


  • OS: X11 enabled Linux distro
  • Processor: Pentium 4 2Ghz / AMD AthlonXP 2400
  • Memory: 512Mb
  • Graphics: GeForce FX5700 or better / ATI Radeon 9600 or better
  • OpenGL: 2.0 compatible video card and compatible drivers
  • Hard Drive: 3.8GB of free space
  • Sound: OpenAL compatible sound card and necessary drivers
Recommended Requirements

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Reviews for The Bard's Tale

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the Bard's Tale


I laughed out loud quite a few times while playing this game. Few games can really make me say that, but this game did. No, it's not the game you'll ever play. Yes, there are some things about this game that are rather aggravating, It doesn't have the best story, It isn't the easiest game to control. There are parts of the game that just don't seem that well made - Yet regardless of all that, this game is probably one of the funniest games you'll ever play, and that more than makes up for any other short comings this game might have. Carey Elwes (Robing Hood: Men in tights) provides the voice of the roguish Bard. There are quite a few unforgettable songs (Beer, Beer, Beer), a snippy narrator who argues quite often with the Bard, and some of the funniest lines you'll find outside of a Monty Python movie. If you are looking for a game that will make you laugh, then you need to give this game a go.

Funny game


Is this (Bard) our new Guybrush ? Almost ..... In this funny game, you will wander through a kingdom and meet all kinds of characters and get a lot of quests. Don't be mistaken if this is a Bard's tale classic. This is an average third person hack & slash that has an outstanding dialogue between the Narrator and our Bard through the hole game. It's easy to play and that's why I recommend it to everyone who likes hack & slash and no brainers with lots of humour.

A fun story marred by weak gameplay


The Bard's Tale is an example of how sometimes a game needs more than a good story to provide a good experience. In this case we have a satire of common tropes in RPG, both in terms of plot (chosen one, damsel in distress) and in terms of usual gameplay (wolves with gold in their bellies, need to find the item before you can continue). The exchanges between Narrator and Bard are some of the very best, and I never thought I would praise a game for its musical numbers, but this game manages to do it. Right now my mind has been taken by the Beer song, but the Chosen One song is trying to take its place. However, this game has some serious flaws. Most of the game involves fighting enemies through a combat system that is at best dull and at worst, frustrating. You have a selection of few weapons to use, which can be resumed mostly as quick, safe, strong or ranged, and you can summon creatures to help you. Controls sometimes don't help and the enemies usually simply make a beeline towards the Bard as soon as they are activated. Trying to fight groups will usually result in failure so combat will often devolve into attracting one or two to kill, healing (or waiting to be healed by a summon) and repeating. Later enemies will have a tendency to respawn and make any movement through the map a painful experience. Fortunately by then you should have better weapons so that they will be little more than speed bumps. I did not enjoy the combat, but I do feel compelled to recommend the game for the jokes and songs, so in the end it will depend on how much you would be interested on those.

Funny RPG game.


Even thought The Bard's Tale have almost nothing common with classic The Bard's Tale (1, 2, 3) games, it's an amazing game. Some of you might know that it was first out on consoles. InXile Entertainment did great job porting it on PCs and playing it on mouse+keyboard feels good. Graphics doesn't looks so great after so many years but that's not important. What's most amazing, this game is FILLED with humour. There are in game so many great moments that will keep you laugh from start to end. Also, great songs! I will never forget beer song. To be honest I didn't say anything about RPG elements but that's how this game should be - it's a funny tale, maybe it's not best RPG around but the most funny one - for sure. If you are looking for good laugh or want to play somehow different RPG game - get The Bard's Tale!

I'm going on an adventure!


The Bard's Tale is your typical western RPG, except that the story is really silly. Actually, the whole game is a goofy mess. You are the Bard (Yeah, he has no name), an adventurer who is looking for fame and fortune but who is not that loyal, honest or even good to begin with The concept is similar to any roleplaying game. You do quests. You earn XP. You proceed in the adventure. With your Bard magic (Which is music) you can summon monsters to help you in battles. The game is not bad at all but it’s not that good either. It’s nice game with funny dialogs but nothing special here. Note that all the original games are included in the package. It’s always cool when a developper gives away some retro goodies like that.

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